Let's talk the 3 big 'R's, i.e.:
1. Rejection aka abandonment 2. Resentment 3. Regrets
Rejection, or rather the fear of, is one of the deepest core wounds, for us women and probably for men too.
It can play out in the following ways:
Avoid doing something for fear of being judged, humiliated and rejected
Over-give and over-do, so we won't be rejected or abandoned
We try and change what we look like or who we innately are - for fears it's not enough and to minimise the likelihood of rejection
People pleasing - I will do everything YOU/THEY want to keep YOU/THEM happy and therefore minimise chance of rejection
Lying, embellishing and twisting the truth/our truth, to not be rejected
Biting our tongue to "Keep the peace" for fear of rejection
You reject someone ie potential partner, partner or friend, before they have a chance to reject you....so you are prepared on some level.
You expect rejection, as you've perceived it's happened before - from a potential job, client, person/people, so you end up attracting that rejection in some form. Then energy/mindset "It's too hard", "Why bother trying" and "They won't want me anyway" develops.
This can of course be conscious and/or unconscious and reflecting our subconscious programming....
Our parent's inability to express emotions or love in the form we needed/wanted, or their absence or their disciplinary approach, may have been interpreted that we were NOT enough, there was something wrong with us and that we were in some way being rejected for who we were/are.
It can even be ancestral - inherited from ancestors and hence, the whole epigenetics piece of inheriting beliefs, stories, traumas and programs, becomes applicable here.
Maybe it's even past life ...... if that resonates with you.
All of this avoidance, people pleasing, over-doing, over-giving etc etc etc...
...... Leads to yep you guessed it - resentment and regrets.
I have seen it time and time again and experienced it first hand, we end up resenting those you we then perceive stood in our way of following our dreams, or for keeping us stuck, for accepting or not valuing our over-giving, over doing and people pleasing ways.
Resentment festers under the surface.
It often accompanies or is associated with anger, frustration and bitterness.
Resentment, that is unexpressed, will turn into rejection - where YOU do the rejecting - no longer wanting to be with that person or in that situation.
It can start off quite subtle, but continue to grow and build up and we wonder why, dis-ease in mind or body develops.
I have seen repressed and suppressed resentment and it's cousins anger, frustration and bitterness, lead to : ...... liver problems, blood pressure, kidney problems, aneurysms and dementia, to name but a few examples.
The third 'R' under the microscope here is regrets.
With all this fear of rejection energy and how we "deal" with it, then of course the subsequent resentment that follows, we often then down the track, have regrets.
1. The time and energy we gave a person/people or situation 2. The time and energy we did not give a person/people or situation
What do we do????
Conscious commitment to change and upgrade this
Feel and express the emotions as they arise - in healthy ways
Honour ourselves - our time, our needs and our energy
Develop strong boundaries
Learn to speak YOUR truth
Creatrix® it - we can identify, remove and replace - all the chronic emotional states, blocks, beliefs and narratives around this and at an epigenetics (source) level - PM for this if curious.
The world needs the feminine to rise. To be part of the healing, the rebirth and the evolution.
You staying small, fearful, resentful and in the energy of regrets, does nothing to serve you or those you are here to serve.